When words collide

I write and read erotica. I watch porn. I drink. So, let me tell you a story that may or may not be true.

One sunny weekend in Florida, a writer had a little too much to drink. And around that same time, she got a text message from a guy who she may have been toying with. Definitely toying with. He has a big dick but doesn’t know how to use it. He has nice thick lips, but ain’t ever ate a lick of pussy.

When a certain writer gets bored or needs content, she plays with him. Wrong. Yes, but some of us date for content because love bites.

Well,  he said “You don’t want me the way I want you.”

She sighed as she read the text. She doesn’t want him at all, to be honest. Been there, done that, was very bored afterwards.

So, she replied like this: I do want you. I want you bent over I want to stick my strap on in your ass. Do you want me the way I want you? 

Of course he was not feeling that! He went all, you sent that to the wrong person. She said, nah, I sent it to the right person.

Then he went all homophobic. I don’t know who you’ve dealt with before, but I don’t take nothing in my ass. I hope you are playing if not and you totally serious we need to part ways. And you need to find a bi or gay dude.

Yeah, because we were together. I mean, we went out three times. He’s always talking about how broke he is and he doesn’t even have his on place to live. See why said writer can’t take him seriously.  So, the writer says K.

If you’re a tester, you know K is the reply you send when you have no fucks left to give. Then he texts again. Call me.

Why? What could we have to talk about?  He’s mad. He’s super mad with a red cape tied around his neck.

A few weeks pass and the writer wonders. Is he still mad?

She asks, because she has Writer’s Block.

His reply launched this post. Writer’s Block be damned.

I mean, I haven’t thought about it, I was just offended that you came at me like that. I don’t hate you.

Really bitch?

A drunken fantasy made you think about hating this writer? I just be damned. He acts as if he was sexually assaulted.

He acts as if he didn’t tell this writer he wanted to tie her up and fuck her.  But when a woman says it, it’s wrong. Get over yourself.

Why is it OK for male fantasies to be played out in porn, in media and when one writer sends a text, this boring motherfucker wants to hate.

Yep, it’s going in a book.